Friday, 6 July 2012

To wine or to whine

So what do you get when you mix one bored person, a glass of wine and a computer? A blog post!! I'll probably regret this tomorrow morning when my wine buzz has worn off and I have to face the horror that is me when tipsy, but right now, regret be damned, I have wine and a keyboard and I know how to use them both. (not at the same time though, that's how you break electrical items. Learn that one the hard way.) Thisiswhathappenswhenidontusemyspacebar. See?? this is going to be fun.

Now I have had a quick look at my posts this week, and a lot of them were so very overly sweet, so I apologise to any of my regular readers who have come away from my website with diabetes this week. In order to regain some sense of non-sentimentality, allow me to present you with a Spiderman meme.

Urge to vomit rainbows shrinking. 

For anyone who doesn't know what a Spiderman meme is, by all means, Google it and prepare to laugh your butt off. I discovered them a few weeks, and now I annoy all of my family with these pictures clogging up their Facebook news feeds any chance I get. 

I don't actually get to drink alcohol much these days now that I'm a mum, there is too much pain in a hangover once you've got children, and they very rarely are sympathetic to the end result of your overindulgences, so it's easier to stay sober these days. But once upon a time I could drink a sailor under the table. (Actually I couldn't but I had a friend who once drank someone from the Navy under the table. She was able to match him shot for shot of Vodka, and keep drinking once he had admitted defeat. Is it sad that she was my hero?) The last time I drank to real excess was about 4 years ago now, and I was following an English girl and her American boyfriend around Melbourne for an evening. I managed to drink eleven beers that evening. I also played with a strange man's dreadlocks and watched my friends win $3,000 on the roulette table. Unfortunately the next morning I realised I can't drink the way I used to when I was 18, as the hangover was absolutely monstrous. Since then I've had to watch my partying days drift away from me until they were a small dot in my past, and I now feel really naughty having a glass of wine on a weekday. 

Well my lovely readers, thank you for helping me relive my wild and reckless days and sharing in my buzz, but now, my glass is empty and given that these days I'm a responsible mum *yawn* I'm going to pour myself a glass of Coke and go watch some trashy TV. Stay awesome, and remember the wise words of Benjamin Franklin: In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.

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