Saturday, 23 September 2017

September Fly on the Wall

It is time once again for September Fly on the Wall. In this series 7 bloggers are joining together to share all of the crazy and funny things you'd here if you were a fly on their wall.

Menopausal Mother                     
Never Ever Give Up Hope                   
Bookworm in the Kitchen                
The Blogging 911                       

Sam was muttering away to herself one day while we were working.
Me: Are you alright over there?
Sam: Yeah, it's called interesting conversations with interesting people.
Me: And the confused people who overhear them.

It was Father's Day in Australia at the beginning of this month, and Natalie decided to buy mum a megaphone as a Father's Day gift. She gave it to her a day early, while I was out visiting Sam. They then decided to pop in for a surprise visit to Sam's house, where mum walked into the house wearing a dinosaur mask and yelling into the megaphone "This is not a drill, I repeat it is not a drill, it is a megaphone." This would all have been hillarious were Sam and I not in the middle of a business phone call at the time. But we did laugh about the absurdity of the event afterwards.

I knew I was getting a good addition to this post when my little sister Natalie texted me asking if I was allowed to say coffee tits on my blog. The photo below explains why she needed to know.

So needless to say Nat has a new nickname now.

Nat: Dave bought me a new pillow, but it smells like that drink the cowboy.
Me: Well I guess that's a good thing as long as you like the smell of cowboys.
Nat: Dave thinks it smells like bamboo, does bamboo smell like alcohol?
Me: I...don't know what bamboo smells like. How is this possible? Mum, I've never smelled bamboo.
Mum: Seriously? You smell everything.
Me: I know. I guess that's something I have to add to the bucket list now. 

Me: Do you have some scissors I can borrow?
Sam: Certainly. Ask and ye shall receive. Seek and ye shall find.
Me: Marco and ye shall polo?

And finally, Natalie had to have an MRI on her back this month, and she very helpfully wrote down some of the thoughts she had whilst strapped into a giant humming tube. With her permission I am repeating all of her thoughts below. As someone who has had several MRIs I can confirm that some of these thoughts are the same ones everyone has whilst stuck in those horrible machines. 

Thoughts from the MRI machine.... story by Natalie 
I'm really glad I put on pretty underwear... this robe covers nothing! 
I could be in a dubstep music video. 
Is the machine laughing at me? 
It sounds like the machine is saying "hahahahaha" let's see what else I can hear the machine saying ...:
"Party party party"
"Paddle battle"
"Don't cry" 
"Dub dub dub"
"Wub wub wub" 

I think someone is playing the theramin... they should make a cd of mri noises and sell it for Halloween parties. Some of these sounds are really creepy. 

Do I even have hands anymore? I can't feel them? I can't feel anything other than pain. I'm gonna have friction burn on my arms from the bed moving up and down... 
something is burning my arm... aaaaand now it's burning my leg

Of course my face is itchy right now

And that's all from me. Don't forget to check out all the other blogs participating.
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