Thursday, 3 May 2012

Treadmills and giraffe hats

Hi guys, I know it's been a couple of days but since I can't afford a secretary to write these blogs for me (or to do my daily walk on my new treadmill) then you guys will have to be patient in waiting for each exciting instalment in this blog.

Life around here is hectic as always, today was my dad's birthday so we had a visit from him this afternoon for coffee, and so that Miss K could give him his present. Apparently my father has been complaining to my big sister that he has no photos of Miss K so we rectified this today by giving him a beautiful photo that was taken at her birthday party, of him and Miss K reading a book. (No one can accuse my dad of not being the life of the party.) I then had to go up the street to have a thickshake with my little sister and to buy some wool.

Why do you need wool I don't hear you ask as you're reading this well after I've gone to bed for the evening, and also I'm not sitting next to you while you read this as that would be creepy. Well for months now I have been searching for an incredibly elusive free pattern for a giraffe hat for babies. This is the latest must have accessory for baby photography and parents who love to humiliate their children by bringing out embarrassing photos of them in ridiculous hats and very little else taken at a time when they were unable to fend for themselves. The problem is that a lot of people are very protective of the work that goes into creating a pattern, and as such charge a fee for the privilege of using said patterns. Given that I am a single mother, and also a self confessed tight arse, I refuse to pay for this privilege and must wait for an incredibly generous person who is prepared to give away their pattern. As luck would happen, one such person has just appeared out of the blue and I have swooped on this incredibly rare opportunity and started making a giraffe hat. The happy dance I did when I found the pattern was worthy of a million hits on you tube, unfortunately as I cannot afford to hire a camera crew to follow me around on a daily basis to film me on the off chance that I do something hilarious, you can only take my word for it. For anyone who can read a crochet pattern and has also been looking for a giraffe hat pattern, please feel free to visit this wonderful angel here and check out her blog to find the pattern. Just a note you cannot republish this pattern, nor can you claim it as your own or sell it. She has already been a victim of piracy once thanks to her generosity, and I would hate to think that any of my wonderful readers could be capable of such sneakiness.

The other thing that has been keeping me busy is my ongoing quest to get healthy. My aches and pains from my attempts at tennis last week are all but gone despite the fact that mum refused to rub Deep Heat into my pulled groin muscle (I can't understand why). I mentioned in my last post that I was on the lookout for a cheap treadmill, and once again the gods were smiling upon me as I managed to snag one on eBay on the weekend. It only took me an hour and a half to travel to and from the seller to pick it up, plus I had to try and fit almost 6 feet of exercise machine in my 6 and a half foot long car which was interesting to say the least, but I am now the proud owner of a piece of machinery that will hopefully help shed the last of the mummy tummy I currently have stored underneath my t-shirt. My whole plan was almost derailed on Monday when I stepped on my trusty scales and found despite my full week of living healthy, I had actually gained weight. I had planned to use denial or blame water retention for this in order to cope, until I reminded myself the ultimate goal here is not actually to lose weight, but to extend life. The stepping on the scales is really just a unit of measurement for me and not the finish line as weight is easy to gain, but extra years are not.

One last thing that has been occupying my time and attention is Pinterest. A friend of mine called me on Monday and told me I absolutely HAD to sign up to this website as it was better than Google, plus most of the rest of the world is already on it and I would be a caveman if I didn't sign up NOW. The only problem with this, for any of my fellow cavemen who have never visited the website, is that you have to ask to be invited to sign up. A bit like in high school when you had to ask the cool kids to be invited to their parties, only this time instead of having to go through a slew of humiliating tasks only to have the cool kids laugh in your face and turn you away, all you have to do is wait for an email. As easy as this sounds, it is an incredibly long and frustrating wait. A bit like in school when you used to send notes to the cute boy in class asking if he liked you with the three options to pick from, yes, no and for the love of god if you don't stop sending me these letters I'm going to get a restraining order. (I was a very progressive stalker, and I always liked to give my victims a way out. It tends to relax them I find.) So I sent my request on Monday, and to date there has been no response, no matter how many times a day I check my inbox.

So for now I remain the nerdy kid in the corner desperately hoping for the day that one of the cool kids invite me to sit at their table at lunch time so I can bask in their warming awesomeness. And as soon as they invite me, I'm going to start pinning things onto them. With thumb tacks.

Until then, stay wonderful my dear readers, and also don't be afraid to drop me a line in my comments box. I'd love to know who is reading my posts, I know there has to be a couple of you out there as my counter is steadily rising up, and it's not just because I keep hitting the refresh button.

Peace out!!!
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