Saturday 15 February 2014

February Use Your Words The Very Bad Day

Hello and welcome to the February edition of the new blogging game Use Your Words. It looks like this series was another winner for Karen at Baking in a Tornado, so she's decided to keep it around for now. 

This is how it works: participating bloggers picked 4 – 6 words or short phrases for someone else to craft into a post. All words must be used at least once and all the posts will be unique as each writer has received their own set of words. That’s the challenge, here’s a fun twist; no one who’s participating knows who got their words and in what direction the writer will take them. Until now. 

So allow me to introduce you to the other bloggers participating in todays challenge. Be sure to visit them all and see how they manage to mold a group of random words into something beautiful. 


http://BakingInATornado.com                   Baking In A Tornado
http://www.justalittlenutty.com                 Just A Little Nutty
http://batteredhope.blogspot.com             Battered Hope
http://www.JuiceboxConfession.com          Juicebox Confession
www.theblacksheepmom.blogspot.com      Black Sheep Mom
http://stacysewsandschools.wordpress.com   Stacy Sews and Schools
http://thethreegerbers.blogspot.ch/              Confessions of a part time working mom
http://www.eviljoyspeaks.wordpress.com     Evil Joy Speaks
http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com         Spatulas on Parade               
http://berghamchronicles.blogspot.com/               The Bergham’s Life Chronicles
www.fbxadventures.blogspot.com                      FBX Adventures (In Parenting)
http://www.healingtomato.com                     Healing Tomato
http://dates2diapers2.blogspot.com                Dates 2 Diapers 2
http://followmehome.shellybean.com               Follow me home . . .
www.outmannedmommy.com/                       Outmanned

Now the other thing you need to know is what words I have been given to include. This time my words were submitted by Spatulas on Parade and they are:  calendar ~ time off ~ jerky ~ teriyaki ~ hot dang ~ slammin 

So I mentioned in my last post how we had the worst bush fires in five years over the last week. I had to go to work on Monday despite the fact that the town I worked in was closed off from all freeway traffic and authorities were telling everyone to stay away from the town. Off course with all of this in mind, I had gone to bed the night before assuming that my boss would tell us to stay home the next day. Despite the fact that I figured I had some time off on the Monday, I was still up at 7am like I always am on a work day. (Trust my stupid body calendar to know it's a weekday) so I texted the office manager asking for confirmation that I should stay home and not do anything insane like drive directly into a fire affected town. Sadly for me she told me I HAD to go to work, and I would need to leave early because I'd have to find an alternate route into town. 

Now I don't know what any of you would do in this situation, but my natural response is to panic. I started tearing around the house madly trying to find clothes for me and Miss K and trying to remember where I put my shoes on Wednesday night after I finished work. I grabbed Miss K and started to take her nappy off, so I could get her cleaned up and ready for day care. What I didn't realise at the time was that I had grabbed her and ripped her nappy off mid bowel movement, when she was beyond the point of no return. I was so distracted and complaining to mum I didn't realise anything was wrong until I noticed the nugget on my carpet, looking a lot like a piece of teriyaki chicken. "Hot dang!" I yelled as I scrambled to pick it up. (Actually what I really said was a lot ruder and more appropriate for when you have a lump of turd on your carpet, but this is a child friendly place right here you know?) By this time Miss K was crying because she was upset she had just done a poo on the carpet, I was crying too from sheer frustration. I sat on my couch with my head in my hands heaving huge jerky sobs and just wishing I could go back to bed. (Or at least crawl into a dark corner and start slammin back the vodkas).

This was the point where mum stepped in and took Miss K off my hands so I could focus on getting ready for work. I had the quickest shower I have ever had, and then raced out the door while wearing my little sister's shoes (I never did manage to figure out where I'd hidden my own shoes until the next morning) and started the long and often terrifying drive to work along some of the most treacherous roads I have ever driven. A trip that normally takes me 15 minutes took an hour and a half of winding, narrow, unfamiliar roads in towns I'd seen on maps but never had the urge to visit for myself.

You'll be pleased to know I made it to work in one piece, and while the office manager was totally unsympathetic to the rough start to my day, my boss was a lot more understanding when we spoke about it the next day. When the freeways were finally reopened and I never had to make that drive ever again. I think the next time the town decides to combust I'll be telling the boss to close the office for the day and just let me go back to sleep.

Well that's all for now, I am off to go share a single bunk bed with a two year old because that's what you do when you visit family for the weekend. Thanks to Spatulas on Parade for my words, especially because I've never been given the opportunity to compare bowel movements to Asian food before, so this was an exciting first for me. Now go on and visit everyone else and enjoy the rest of the festivities.

19 comments:

  1. No one compares bowel movements to Asian food like you do, LOL.
    What a harrowing experience. I can't even imagine being in the vicinity of fires like that.

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    1. That is high praise indeed coming from you Karen. The fires are slowly going out, and while the mine is still burning like a champion the surrounding towns are no longer in danger. It is certainly a relief that it all appears to be over for now bar the smoke.

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  2. I can't believe you had to go to work in those conditions. You deserve a raise! I'm glad to read that you are safe.

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    1. I was thinking of asking my boss for a raise, I'll now tell her that you said she has to give me one. I'll see how that works for me and let you know.

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  3. OMG I was confused at first and laughing by the end. Asian food and a kid turd? LOL
    HOT DANG you did it!
    Spatulas On Parade

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    1. Dawn that was certainly the most American list of words I've ever had to use in one post. I loved trying to twist it around, and I think I now need to start saying hot dang more. Thank you for letting me use the Asian food as turd reference too. That totally made the day almost worth while.

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  4. HUGS!!!! How scary!!!!! So glad you made it through!!!
    Kudos to you! I don't think I would have gone in at all!!

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    1. Thank you Stacy. If I was any less of a coward I certainly would have been telling my boss to take my job and fill it, because no one in their right mind would willingly go through that, but we all survived and I have another story for the grandchildren one day.

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  5. A very day day indeed!
    I'm glad your safe and you made it through.
    Any day that starts off with cleaning poo off the floor while racing to beat a wall of fire into the city, deserves a trophy and perhaps a raise.
    Maybe a perfect cup of coffee delivered to your desk?
    You might have to settle for a chocolate bar and a hug but eh, better than nothing. ;)

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    1. Coffee, chocolate, hugs I'll take any and all of them if offered. I did get doughnuts on the day, but I had to walk to the supermarket and buy them myself. There just isn't enough gratitude for people who drive into fire affected towns I feel.

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  6. Isn't it crazy how on the other side of the world people have "snow days" and are not expected to drive to school or work, and Down Under you go all Crocodile Dundee driving through bush fires?

    I think you deserve to focus on just one word you got this weekend: TIME OFF :-)

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    1. Time off would be fabulous. And I would gladly take just one of your snow days right now as I think it would certainly make life a little bit easier around here.

      Thank you for the Crocodile Dundee reference, I now have images of me trying to hypnotise the fire with my fingers just so I can get past the freeway stuck in my head. Good times.

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  7. "Hot Dang"!! Kudos to Dawn for coming up with that phrase and kudos to you for picking such a unique story. Maybe, someday, your shoes will turn up.

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    1. I love hot dang!! I seriously need to figure out how to work it into my vocabulary. And would you believe the shoes showed up the very next morning when I was no longer in a panic? They had been hiding behind the over locker the whole time. Go figure.

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  8. I really enjoyed your post. Great use of your words. I hope you never have to go to work near fires again. I live in California, and we have a lot of wildfires. They're scary. I'm with you on wanting distance between myself and the fires. Thank you for sharing this with me/us!!!

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    1. I've heard about the California fires, I feel your pain. I'm sure people wonder why we stick around such dangerous areas, but the rewards are always worth the risks. Thanks for stopping by Jules, always a pleasure :)

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  9. Whoa, how scary! I'm pretty sure I would've turned back and said forget it! Glad you made it through that crazy day :)

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    1. I tell you what, if I was any saner I probably would have done exactly the same thing. I'm not certain the big boss wouldn't have fired me for such disloyalty, but I guess we'll never know.

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  10. this was crazy.. how did you even go by it

    http://www.babypregnancycare.com/4-interesting-ways-of-using-your-baby-stroller/

    http://www.babypregnancycare.com/10-beautiful-toddlers-dresses/

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