Do any of the parents who read my blogs ever feel like shaking the absolute snot out of their children? I don't think there will be anyone I ask with children who will honestly be able to say no. But the thing is, there is no shame in admitting that your kids posses the unnatural ability to be able to press all of your buttons at the same time. There is also no shame in admitting that sometimes it is nigh on impossible to control your temper when this happens. The shame lies in when you refuse to control your temper and do something you will ultimately regret for the rest of your life.
Today was not a good day for Miss K and I. We almost came to blows several times, and I ended up leaving her with my mum and walking out of the room for several minutes to have a bit of a teary in the privacy of my own bedroom until I felt ready to be able to take care of her again. It probably doesn't help that both Miss K and I are the victims of raging hormones at the moment, (that is something that really shocked me when I discovered it, my 1 year old daughter gets PMS. Go figure.) unfortunately given that I am the adult in this relationship, it is up to me to control my moods in spite of what my body decides to pump through my system. Which explains the walking out of the room. Had I stayed in the same room as Miss K, she would have gotten a smack, and something I have always been taught is never smack your child when you are angry, because you will always take it too far.
I'm pretty happy so far with how I deal with both of our moods, even if it means Miss K sometimes has to have a time out in her cot until we've both cooled down. But it doesn't mean that I am perfect. I can't say that I've never had to resist the urge to smack Miss K when I'm furious with her and the world in general, but the important thing is not that the temptation hasn't been there, but how you deal with the temptation when it arises, and I've never given in to my anger only to regret it later, and I feel that is more important than being a perfect mum. Of course even though I didn't take my anger out on Miss K today, she was still affected by it. It took me a solid twenty minutes to calm both myself and her down and get on with our day, which sometimes can he a harder thing to do than to properly deal with what made you angry in the first place.
But we made it through the day anyway, and we were best friends again not long after our fight. That is one of the things I love about Miss K is her infinite ability to forgive and forget. An hour after everything exploded she was sitting in her cousins lap eating a muffin and dancing along to something on the telly, and everything in the world was right. I don't think anyone could ask for any more than that.