How to survive the post-holiday slump

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Hello to all my wonderful readers, you may have noticed I fell off the radar again this month. Once I finally got over all of my various illnesses, (except for the conjunctivitis Miss K so kindly shared with me two weeks ago) I discovered the silly season was well and truly upon us, and I needed to get my ample bottom into gear to get ready for the celebrations. I'm sure you'll all appreciate how crazy things get around this time of year, so even if I did attempt to write anything, it would have come out as a crazed stream of consciousness, complete with rambles about tinsel and presents for a family of 15. But now with the endless stream of parties and gift giving ceremonies almost behind us for another year, I sit here eating what's left of the plum pudding in an empty room, wondering to myself now what?

We hosted Christmas at my house this year, and in a stroke of what I can only call pure insanity, mum decided the party needed to be beach themed this year. So I spent a crazed week crawling through Pinterest trying to find beach themed decor I could do on a budget of free hugs and my most charming smile, and managed to cobble together a beach themed party that even a mermaid couldn't fault. Then our annual Boxing Day party got moved from my big sister's house to our house at the last minute due to inclement weather, and the fact that we have a larger living space to accommodate all of the slightly larger bodies thanks to the feast we put out the day before, so we ended up having two parties in two days at our house. On top of that I spent three hours building a kitchen for Miss K at 9pm Christmas Eve, went shopping every single day for a week for more Christmas essentials, and also cleaned the house so that we weren't shamed by the fact that for 364 days of the year we live like someone from an episode of Hoarders, Buried Alive. So sitting here now, with nothing to do is kind of hard to do. Add to that the fact that Miss K has now gone to Melbourne for a week to have Christmas with her father and his family, and I am as lost as a one legged man in a butt kicking contest. So I have decided to share with you some of the techniques I have learned over the years to get over the post-holiday blues that always hit at this time of year, to help you guys achieve the balanced calm I so clearly show on a daily basis.

Me on a good day

Go shopping

Now that gift giving season is over, you really have no reason to go shopping, but that is exactly why you should get out now, more than ever. Beside getting to take advantage of the opportunity to return any practical gifts that well meaning long distance relatives bought you at the last minute so they didn't show up at your house empty handed, you can witness human beings at their absolute worst, thus making you appreciate your empty house and it's lack of festive feelings all the more. The long line of customers all coming to complain about the over priced child's toy that broke five minutes after being removed from it's packaging only makes you love your own family all the more, because they aren't that obnoxious man at the front of the line loudly proclaiming that this is the last time he shops at this particular store. 

Clean up your house

You've just spent the last month complaining that if you stepped on another bauble the whole tree was going into the bin, so now is the time to make good on your promise. Pull down the tinsel, drag every strand of angel hair out of your carpet, and throw all of it in the bin (or into storage if you can't stand the thought of having to replace it all again in ten months time). The sight of you going into a cleaning craze will send your children running outside just in case you get the bright idea to give them any jobs to do of their own, so now is the perfect time to "lose" any of the irritating noise makers or cheap plastic toys they were given by the same well meaning relatives who thought a life time supply of micro fibre cloths was the perfect gift for you at the same time. This is also a good time to search for any stashes of chocolates the kids have hiding in their rooms, and add them to your own stash of chocolate hidden in your bedroom. You need the sugar more than they do, as you're the one who spends your life chasing after them trying to get them to act like civilized human beings. 

Put on some tunes and dance alone in your living room

Just because the party season is over, doesn't mean you need to pack away your best moves for another year. The lack of audience apart from your children is irrelevant, as you can always embarrass them, no matter the time of year, so get your boogie on and keep the party going as long as you want it to. If you didn't get to do the Nutbush this year because you got vetoed at the last second by someone wanting to do the Whip Nae Nae (whatever the hell that is) then put that song on repeat and Nutbush until you can't move any more. You deserve it after all the hard work you've put into these holidays.

Eat all the party food in the house

If you were too busy to eat during Christmas because you were hosting the party, now is the time to get yourself a big plate of whatever is left over and eat it in front of every one. Diets are for the first day of January anyway. I personally like to buy two plum puddings, simply because I am a horrible pig who doesn't like to share my food, so I always have enough pudding to last me several weeks once all the parties are done with. I don't need to buy any breakfast or lunch foods for ages now because I spent an extra $4 a week ago. That's not only smart, it's economical. 

Start getting ready for the next big celebration now

If you've been bitten by the party bug but Valentines Day is too far away from you, get on Google now and find another holiday closer to today you can prepare for. For Australians, Australia Day is always a good one, as it falls on 26th January, meaning there is plenty of time still left to start preparing our barbeques and best Australian Flag decorated party supplies for the big day. For something even closer again, check out Earth Calendar which tells you exactly what you can celebrate every single day of the year. For example today is St Stephens day in Bulgaria. So if that is enough reason for you to party, get out your best duds and celebrate St Stephen as only you can. 

Sleep

If all else fails, get into your pyjamas and go back to bed. 

Well that should be enough to get you through the next few days, so if you'll excuse me, it is currently the Stanley Sports Day in the Falkland Islands so I'm off to hit a tennis ball against a wall to honor this special day. 

April Fly on the Wall - poetry to my eyes

Hello again people, I'm back for another Fly on the Wall.  Take a seat, grab some popcorn and enjoy the insanity that is my home on a daily basis.


Before I begin, I'll link to everyone else participating today, be sure to buzz along to their websites once you're finished here so they can feel some of your love too.

http://www.BakingInATornado.com          Baking In A Tornado

http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com/     Spatulas on Parade

http://followmehome.shellybean.com        Follow me home

http://www.menopausalmom.com/           Menopausal Mother

http://stacysewsandschools.blogspot.com/ Stacy Sews and Schools

http://batteredhope.blogspot.com             Battered Hope

http://www.justalittlenutty.com/               Just A Little Nutty

http://themomisodes.com                        The Momisodes

http://www.someoneelsesgenius.com        Someone Else’s Genius

http://gndisney.wordpress.com                 Disneyland in Kentucky

http://www.angelaweight.com                  Sanity Waiting to Happen

http://thesadderbutwisergirl.com               The Sadder But Wiser Girl

http://dinoheromommy.com/                    Dinosaur Superhero Mommy

http://www.juiceboxconfession.com          Juicebox Confession

Miss K: Mummy I'm going to punch you. Then she did. You can't say I wasn't warned though.

So mum bought poetry magnets this month. You have no idea how much this excited me. The look on that googly face on the fridge is pretty much the look I made when she showed me.

Miss K spent Easter at her dad's house. We Skyped on Easter Sunday  Nonna: Say happy Easter mum Miss K: Happy Easter egg mum. The true meaning of Easter for a four year old.

The poetry slam started immediately.

My big sister and I were having a bitchy conversation about the women my exes choose after we separate... Me: You know what they say, you can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. Sam: But you can make the beast with two backs with it apparently...

I've always wanted to make a poem about a yak!

Miss K: I'm so cute mum (for the millionth time) Me: Yes. You're smart too. Miss K: Yeah, I'm cute. Me: You know there's more to life than being cute don't you Miss K: Really? Me: Yes, being smart is pretty important too. Can you say I am smart? Miss K: I am smart. Me: Good girl! Miss K: Awww I'm sooo cute. I give up.

It's not in iambic pentameter, but it does include curse words...

So Kim had a party for her 23rd birthday, and we held it at our house. Here are just some of the things you would have heard had you come over that day...
Kim: The one day mum doesn't have any newspaper around is the one day I'm trying to start a fire...
Me: Sadly this isn't the most indecent thing I've done with a Barbie doll. Kim: Why am I not surprised?
Kim: So I was waiting by the car for Scott to come and unlock it, and he walks up and goes "Excuse me, do I know you?? Can you get away from my car please?" I was like Scott don't start this, just let me in the bloody car, and then he yells "No I won't give you any money!"
Tristan: What smells like ironed clothes? Me: I have perfume on. Ben: Who's pregnant?
Nat: Siri, how many chromosomes do people have? Tristan: Twenty six! Siri: Hmm let me think, here is what I found on how many chromosomes do people have sex?

I hope Karen from Baking in a Tornado feels better about her poetry now...

Me: Miss K, get over here and get dressed. Miss K: You do it, you're my slave.
Well that's all the madness I've got for you this month, be sure to visit the rest of the bloggers and see what they've been up to behind closed doors.

Before the new, a bit of the old

Happy 2014 my lovely people, I know I've been pretty absent the past month but things around here have been CRAZY busy these past weeks, and sadly when the chips are down this blog is the first place to get ignored. So thank you all for your never ending patience while you waited for me to get my head above water yet again, and to reward you all I have decided to grace the interwebs with yet another nugget of sparkling wisdom.

So to say that December was the worst month I've had in a long time seems like a slight understatement. There were pretty sad lows, a few health scares and lots of tears. My big sister lost her brother in law to suicide at the beginning of the month, and the whole family are still trying to come to terms with their grief and loss. I knew her brother in law, having gone to high school with him for a few years, and I even did my debutante ball with him back when I was 16. He very kindly stepped in to be my partner when all my other potentials fell through, even though by that stage he'd moved to a different school. As an added bonus, when his big brother finally married my big sister we were partnered together again for the wedding party and I already knew he was a good dancer. It was a life cut tragically short and his absence is strongly felt by everyone who knew him. My heart has broken time and time again for my big sister and my brother in law this month watching them feel such pain and I can only hope the day comes soon that this all becomes a little easier for them.

Also receiving a major hit was my sister in law who discovered in November that she would need to get her leg amputated. She had a bad infection in her foot and it hit the bone. It shouldn't have been so urgent except that she also discovered that she is pregnant again in November (Yay!!) and infections tend to be pretty bad for developing babies, so they had to chop the leg off. No one knew what was going to happen to the baby, whether or not it could cope with the anesthetic and the shock of major surgery, but luckily both mum and baby came out the other side OK and we now get to welcome a new baby into our family later this year. I have already advised I will not be joining her in getting knocked up this time (Miss K is 3 months younger than their daughter) but I will happily watch her swell up from the sidelines.

Then Miss K and I had an emergency visit to the Sunshine hospital on Christmas Eve after she fell and hit her head on the tiled floor at Nonna's house. I didn't see the actual fall as I was in the laundry doing some washing, but Miss K's Nonna insisted that the fall was only minor and took Miss K off for a drive to cheer her up. Unfortunately for us Miss K has a habit of falling asleep in the car, and sure enough she dozed off this time too. For anyone with basic knowledge of head injuries, you'd know that you never let anyone with a bump to the head go to sleep, as you can't properly observe a sleeping baby. Sure enough Miss K woke up with vomiting and dilated pupils and we rushed her to the emergency room to make sure everything was ok. The staff at Sunshine hospital were absolutely amazing, and knew exactly how to examine a sick two year old. There were stickers and bubbles and everything else a little girl could love, and she didn't even realise she was undergoing medical tests. Luckily for us she only had a mild concussion, there were no signs of bleeding to the brain or fractures to the skull so we were given permission to give her some pain killers and after watching her tear around the emergency room in a Cosy Coupe for an hour and a half they were happy enough to let us go home. For Ady and I the visit to the hospital was an awful trip down memory lane, as it was nearly three years ago we made our first visit to an emergency room when Miss K got meningitis. As horrible luck goes, Ady's car broke down that morning so he couldn't even drive us to the hospital. I had to throw Miss K into Nonna's car and get her to take us to the hospital and Ady caught up with us there. Watching him walk up to our bed on the ward was the most relieved I had felt since the whole disaster started and I burst into tears. By then we had been told that she was going to be ok, but I still couldn't relax until we were allowed to go home and I could see my mum. Of course for me, home was still more than two hours away, so it was a white knuckle trip home. Poor Ady tried to make conversation the whole drive but I was too busy waiting for Miss K to throw up again to really talk.

Despite having taken a knock to the head, Miss K did bounce back pretty quickly, and because I was waking her up every 4 hours to take more pain killers, her Christmas started at 2am when she saw her first present, her very own Cosy Coupe, which my little sister Kim had been putting together while we were driving home. It was just dumb luck that she had already spent the better part of her afternoon screaming around the hospital in one the day before so she knew how to drive it, but I'd had the car on lay by for a whole month before Christmas, because I am just an awesome mum.

Pictured: The daughter of the best mum ever!

Christmas went pretty smoothly despite everything I've mentioned above, we had lunch at our place with almost all the family, Ben and Tristan decided to spend Christmas with Tristan's family so we won't get to give them their gifts until they come down for mum's birthday next week, but Ady did get to come and spend the day with his daughter, and watching the two of them play together was a wonderful way to spend Christmas. She got more presents than I could possibly find homes for, including a kitten, which has been named Bertie Beetle (because why not?) and he is quickly becoming one of the family. 

He's pretty cute for a fur ball.

Given that I am very allergic to cats and usually go out of my way to avoid them at all costs, I will admit that he's pretty cute for a cat, and because I am the one who feeds him and cleans his litter tray, I get most of the cuddles off him, but Miss K is trying her hardest to get him to play with her, even if her methods are rough to say the least. Surprisingly enough Bertie puts up with most of her rough housing, only crying when she grabs him by the tail or the legs. I have had to rescue him from her death grip on more than one occasion but I'm sure they'll find their groove soon enough.

So that's pretty much summed up the past month. Ady is still in town, so Miss K has been spending time with him every day this week, much to her delight, and I'm loving it because it makes a wonderful bargaining chip for me whenever she refuses to go to bed. Any time she gets up one too many times I tell her she can't see dad tomorrow if she misbehaves and it pulls her head right in. I've also gotten some much needed quiet time while they go off together so I'm feeling almost relaxed at the moment. Except that we're also trying potty training right now so there's always something to worry about.

Well I'll be back again tomorrow with more gems for you guys, so stay tuned for that. Also I'm taking part in three blog series put together by Karen from Baking in a Tornado this month, the first one coming up very soon, so keep your eyes peeled guys. But until then, as always, stay awesome and happy new year.

Miss K turns 2

So I will apologise now for being so quiet the past few days, for anyone who has been hiding under a rock for the past week, Miss K turned 2 yesterday, so between madly rushing around getting everything organised, and then hosting her afternoon tea yesterday, I haven't had much time for extra curricular activities lately. Even last night after everything was over and done with, I was so tired I was in bed by 7:30 and I didn't surface again until my alarm clock went off this morning.

So for anyone who doesn't get excited for photos of a toddler's birthday party, now might be a good time to step away from the computer, because between me and my sisters, I got over 100 pictures of yesterday's fun and games, and now I get to share the highlights with you guys.

The fun started (as most fun does) at 1am on Sunday morning. That is when Miss K woke up for the first time on her birthday. Now I had a feeling this would happen, because mum and I had decided to put up her biggest presents before the morning, to save her having to open boxes and then wait an hour for all the toys to be assembled. It was a good thing we did this, because her absolute biggest present, a mini trampoline thanks to grandma took forever to put together, and even then needed to be pulled apart by my brother in law and reassembled when they showed up later in the morning. So Miss K got an extra 2 hours on her birthday to play with her presents.

The new trampoline thanks to Grandma

The new bike thanks to Aunty Kim

The new drums thanks to mum because I know how much she likes loud noise.

Then when we all got up for the second time yesterday morning, she got to open the rest of her presents, and spent the rest of the morning running from toy to toy, trying to play with everything.

Tiny Tim has nothing on Miss K's mad ukulele skills

An Elmo book because why not?

A computerised Magna Doodle type thingy. The voice is very, very annoying.

After lunch, because I am an eternal optimist at heart, I tried to get Miss K to go down for a nap, and while she didn't argue with me, she certainly didn't sleep, and we ended up getting her out of bed while we were still madly trying to get everything ready for the afternoon tea. 

Don't ask me how I managed it, but we got everything ready for 2:00, including the donut cake (as previously mentioned here) and we were ready to start partying when everyone started arriving.

This is the last photo of Miss K without a face full of chocolate thanks to my decision to serve every chocolate biscuit under the sun for afternoon tea

Miss K's new keyboard thanks to Aunty Sam and family

Let the chocolate moustaches begin. Miss K and her cousin.

My attempt at a donut cake. I love how this photo looks like it could have been pulled straight out of a magazine. That is how awesome a photographer my big sister is, she can even make my terrible attempts at baking look good.

Miss K blowing out her candles. I spent three months training her to wait until after the singing was finished to blow out the candles. She almost made it to the end of the song before she started blowing, luckily we were too far away from the candles.

There is no clean way to eat donuts, especially when they are smothered with chocolate frosting. 

Miss K offering my big sister (behind the camera) half a donut. At least she shares.

By 5:00 everyone had gone home, so Miss K and I jumped into the shower to hose off all the chocolate, then we both went to bed, absolutely wiped out. 

Well that is another birthday over and done with. I cannot believe that my baby is two now. I can still remember the day she was born (but everything else after that just seems to be a blur.) It's still impossible for me to comprehend that the following photo is 2 years old now.

Pictured: something I thought only happened yesterday. Not pictured: where the hell the last two years went.

Well that's all from me for now, I'll be back again once I've recovered from yesterday, I'm thinking I need three days of sleep right now just to get rid of the extra baggage that has appeared under my eyes this weekend. 

It's all over red rover

Well here we are at the other end of Christmas, and my feet are certainly thankful for this. My lounge room looks like we were hit by a sand storm, Miss K is finally tucked up in bed and mum has gone off to my little sister's house to celebrate the end of another Christmas with a few drinks. (And then maybe a few more.)

Today was everything I could have hoped for and more. Miss K's reaction this morning when she got her first glimpse of the lounge room covered in toys and presents was absolutely priceless. And had it not been 6:45 in the morning, I'm sure I would have been even more ecstatic watching her joy. She spent the morning tearing paper off presents and trying to squeeze in as much play with all of her new toys as possible.

Digging in the new and still full sand pit

Meeting her new Elmo toy. He got carted around with us all day

Mum helping Miss K open another present. (Yes that's really what I look like at 7am)

Miss K "riding" her new bike

Brunch with Miss K's dad was more excitement, as he came with presents from him and Nonna as well as some friends of his back home. I got excited too because he bought McDonalds bagels with him, which are a rare treat for me.

On the way to lunch at my little brother's house Miss K actually fell asleep in the car, which did not fill me with much hope for her being able to stay happy for very long, but apparently all she needed was a 2 minute nap because she was full of energy for the next 4 hours. And then when we got home she only had an hour long nap before she was ready to get up and play again. I have no idea where she gets this much energy from but I'm thinking of finding a way to bottle it up to keep me going on long days.

Lunch was the same chaotic fun it is every time my whole family gets together. There were almost as many Nerf guns there as people thanks to my nephew, and no one escaped from the afternoon without at least one shot to the head. Mine came from mum when she got tired of listening to me explain something and popped a bullet off in my general direction. None of us realised it would get me right between the eyes until it met its target. Luckily Nerf bullets are only foam otherwise it could have been painful, but I couldn't complain because I was laughing too hard.

And then this evening after we had all had our nap and were feeling refreshed, mum went off to keep the party going while Miss K and I had dessert for dinner. (Because hey, it's Christmas.) 

But now the house is completely quiet and I have a new video game with thanks to Miss K (and Grandma) that has finally installed on my computer and is calling for me to play it.

I hope everyone else had a wonderful day filled with as much fun and laughter as I did, and I'll be back again soon once the effect of too much food has worn off and I can get the energy up to write again.

Santa Claus is coming...

I had to squeeze one more post in before Christmas was finally here.

The presents are all wrapped or set up and waiting to be played with. (except for the one I just remembered was still sitting in the family room waiting to be wrapped. Damn.)

Miss K's brand new Elmo bistro table 

The sand pit is finally full of sand

Almost all of the rest of the presents. 

Now all I have to do is crawl to my bed and fall asleep. Tomorrow is going to be a big day. After we've opened all our presents, we're going for brunch with Miss K's dad, then we've got lunch at my brother's place with the whole family, then I can finally come home and have a well deserved nap.

Merry Christmas all my awesome readers, have a great day tomorrow (or the day after for anyone behind us) and I'll see you on the other side.

Busy little blogger

I know I have left it too long once again between posts here. I watch all of these wonderful bloggers manage to post with amazing regularity and all I can do and sit here and wonder how do they manage to fit it in between feeding their kids, cleaning their houses and actually doing the projects that they blog about. I am lucky if I get dressed before lunch time lately, so such capability just leaves me in absolute awe.

So this blog is just a quick update of our weekend really, because the silly season is well and truly starting, and Miss K and I are starting to find our little calendar filling up for the next few weeks, and this weekend just passed was an excellent start to the party season. As predicted, the Christmas tree got a face lift and we now have a lounge room full of Santa vomit. (For a full explanation of that term, check out this blog post here)

Santa vomit in progress....

This is the point where I realise that I never actually got a photo of the finished product (oops) but if you've seen one Christmas tree you've seen them all really so you'll just have to take my word that it looks awesome. Of course my special little Christmas elf was right in the thick of things playing with everything she could get her hands on and having an absolute ball in the meantime. 

I had to rescue this plastic candy cane from her mouth several times during the day.

On Saturday afternoon we went to my little brother's house for his daughter's second birthday party. There were lots of kids there, as well as a jumping castle, several motorised cars and Donald Duck...

Yes that is my lovely daughter running away from a grown man dressed up as a duck. Trust me, if I didn't know it was my uncle underneath that mask I would have run too. Considering that it was about 30 degrees in the shade on Saturday afternoon that was not a very comfortable costume for my poor uncle to be wearing. Luckily the kids loved the surprise and even Miss K warmed up to him eventually

I swear that is not pure terror on her face...

I even got my photo taken with him, even though by the time he got to me he was so tired and over heated that he had started to wilt somewhat...

No he's not eating his hand, he's fixing his face...

Once the presents were opened and the cake had been cut my brother bought out my niece's wading pool, at which point I realised I had forgotten Miss K's bathers and towel. Well Miss K has never been one to let that stop her and decided to jump in the water fully clothed. 

Well that's one way to cool yourself down...

Of course her cousin seeing Miss K jump into the water fully clothed decided this was an awesome idea and jumped right in after her. So there was nothing left to do but strip both the girls off and let them both back into the water. Of course my niece isn't quite as physical in showing her excitement as Miss K is, and got several face-fulls of water thanks to Miss K's vigorous splashing. All the photos my sister got show my niece looking rather miserable, and she did spend a lot of time yelling at Miss K to stop. But all of us adults had a good laugh. When the girls started shivering we decided they'd had enough time in the water and it was time to go home and put Miss K to bed for a nap. 

After tea Miss K and I went to my big sister's house so she could test out taking photos of Miss K wrapped up in Christmas lights. While the project wasn't a complete success I think she managed to figure out how to do it properly next time. I hope to have another crack at it again soon, and hopefully I can have some decent photos to show you this time to make up for my own terrible attempts. 

As for Sunday, I decided that one exciting day was enough for this weekend, so we had a very quiet Sunday hanging around the house and watching Miss K try her hardest to destroy the Christmas tree.

Well that's it for now, I'll be back again soon I hope, providing that Miss K allows me to have some quiet time over the next few days. Stay awesome till then wonderful readers.

Belated birthday revenge...

Whoops a daisy, I almost forgot the special birthday post for my little sister. I knew last night that there was something I was meant to be doing on here, but do you think I could remember what it was? Well it's probably for the best that I left it for today because I am fresh as a daisy and ready to pay back my little sister for hacking my Facebook.

But it isn't just about revenge, it's also about wishing her a happy birthday. And because she didn't have very many humiliating photos on her photo board at her 21st birthday party last year, I figured now was the time to rectify that oversight and flood my blog with as many cringe-worthy pictures as I could find.

So I guess a little bit of a back story is needed so that you guys can understand the content of the following photos. Well once upon a time many years ago (ok four years ago) Nat and I were drinking buddies. Given that by the time Natty was old enough to drink I'd been out of the pub scene for about 3 years we tended to meet up at my place to hold our shenanigans, as I preferred being able to enjoy my alcohol without the hoards of sweaty, sloppy teenagers that you tend to find in pubs and nightclubs. Now the one drawback of drinking at home is you don't have to behave yourself quite as much as you would in public, so we would get a bit messy ourselves. And for some reason we always decided to capture the messiness for future generations to admire. (I don't understand the logic there either.) But terrible photography aside, I always had fun with my drinking buddy, and we would spend lots of time laughing (and crying once the alcohol started wearing off.) It was a sad day for both of us when I realized that our days of drunken shenanigans were over now that I was going to be a mum and had to start acting like a responsible person. So in a way I'm glad that these photos exist because they are all that's left of my wild and misspent youth. Although I'm not quite sure that Nat will feel the same way about them as I do.

Careful, I think she's about to burst!

Now where did I put my cigarette then?

I said love, I said pet, I said love...

Now that is one happy camper...

Like I said, messy.

So happy birthday Fat Kat. Even though this is a day late the sentiment is still the same, I have horrible photos of you and I'm not afraid to use them. 

*Editors note, I know I promised the next blog post would be about a Christmas planning book, and the post is still coming, however the batteries in my camera died so I have to wait till they recharge to take some photos of the finished product. 

Another birthday

I am so tired right now, so very, very tired. Soooo...........tired.

So you may have guessed that I'm tired. If you haven't guessed that yet you're probably as tired as I am. For goodness sake go to bed now and read this blog in the morning if that is the case. I can wait, I'm a very patient person (not really but I'll make an exception this time).

So why am I so tired you ask?? I have no darn idea. It has been a little busier than normal over here at the casa de insanity, Ben and Tristan came down yesterday to take my niece to the Melbourne show, they stayed here last night and this afternoon the rest of the family all swarmed in our suddenly tiny lounge room to celebrate my niece's ninth birthday. So far she got the trip to the Melbourne show, a party at our place, on Monday she's going ice skating with my baby sister, and the best part of the present is going to be this weekend with her parents. I can't say too much because I have no idea if she reads my blog, and if she does I don't want to give the surprise away, but all I can say is I am so jealous right now, as she is getting to fulfil the dream of every 9 year old girl this Saturday. And no, she isn't meeting Justin Bieber.

I didn't go to the Melbourne show yesterday, but that is because I really didn't feel like shelling out $35 for a ticket into the show and then the exorbitant prices for rides, foods and show bags. I did however send a shopping list up with Ben, and Miss K woke up this morning to see a shiny new ABC show bag sitting in the lounge room waiting for her. She also got a new Elmo teddy from Tristan, and a stuffed duck toy from my niece. Oh to be one and cute again.

Or to be nine and have so many awesome aunts and uncles. I actually feel guilty about my gift to my niece, because while every one else has splashed out and got her trips to special events I got her a Beados set. Woot. She promised me she loves it, and she sounded genuine, and I'm not sure she is very good at lying about these things because I still remember her reaction at her birthday last year when she got a surfer t-shirt that she knew was from the boys section of K-Mart.

I am still struggling to wrap my head around the fact that my baby niece is 9 years old. I can still remember the day she was born, and it feels like it was yesterday. It was grand final night, we had been sitting around the house for hours waiting to hear the good news that the baby was finally born, I had exhausted myself by nervously scrubbing out the shower and fallen asleep on the couch when the call finally came. I can even remember that she was born weighing 6 pounds 7 ounces. But ask me what I was wearing yesterday and I draw an absolute blank.

So given the excitement we've had around here the last few days plus the visit Miss K and I paid to an old friend this afternoon, I am very, very, verrrry tired and I feel I must go to bed before I start drooling on the keyboard in my sleep. Have a good one y'all and I'll be back bright eyed and busy tailed tomorrow. Oh and a big happy birthday to my gorgeous niece too.

Dear Diary the bitter-sweet edition.

Well it's that time of the week again where I tell all of you my wonderful readers about everything Miss K and I have been up to over the past seven days. Well really most of it will be about this weekend, as I managed to cram more in the last two days than I did in the rest of the week. (Stupid gastro)

I am finally better thank heavens, I only really needed one day of bed rest and sulking before I was up and moving again, but my appetite and energy took a lot longer to return to me, I've only really been eating properly for about three days now, and even then my portion sizes have been smaller than normal while I get used to food again. I was determined to make up for having to cut my adults night out short on Monday, so this weekend has been full of social calls and outings, but luckily because they were all during the day time Miss K got to come with me. We crashed a Nutrimetics party yesterday, and by crashed I mean we tagged along with someone who was actually invited to the event. This is the second shopping party we've crashed in as many weeks Miss K and I, both with the same friend. Last week we went to a Tupperware party with her and both times we have been made to feel very welcome despite the fact that we knew no one there and they were all meeting us for the first time. I even decided to splash out and buy some perfume after yesterday's party, as I always feel there is no such thing as too many bottles of smelly stuff.

I also finally got to eat my cupcakes yesterday as Miss K and I managed to get our choc banana cupcakes baked in the afternoon while my brother and sister were visiting. Of course Miss K's help only went as far as licking the spoons once I was finished with them, but she was happy to be my dishwasher for the day. I was quite proud of the cakes as they tasted delicious and they didn't look too bad either. It was my first attempt at piping frosting on cupcakes and while it doesn't look completely professional, it wasn't a bad first attempt. I took some photos before I ate them all, so that I could share them all with you.

Tell me one more time they look like poo cupcakes and I will hurt you.

Sadly my photography skills are still lacking, but my cooking skills are pure awesome

Today I took mum and Miss K to the Sunday Market in the next town over. Miss K's dad and I actually used to run a stall at this market before Miss K was born, and it was sad to see it as a shell of its former bustling self, but I'm hoping it was just the horrible weather that was keeping everyone away. I remember spending most of our Sunday there every week for a few months the year we met, and we made friends with some of the other wonderful stall holders, but they have all moved on to other markets now days and I was sad to see I didn't recognise any of the stall holders when I went today. There was such a sense of family with the stall holders there, you would pass each other's stalls and wave hello or stop in and chat if you were close, and they were all so helpful when we first started there, telling us which stall holders to avoid selling to as they always resold your stock at ridiculously up-marked prices.

After we were finished at the market we went and visited with my big sister for a coffee, and Miss K sat with her uncle and had a cheese sandwich. For some reason he was able to get her to take small lady-like bites, which is something I can never get from her, and she sat very straight and proper on his lap the whole time without squirming or reaching around for things out of her reach. I can't help but laugh at how flirty my little miss gets, even with her own uncles. After lunch and a nap we went to visit with some old friends that we met co-incidentally through the markets. We bumped into them at the market and I was saddened to discover they are moving closer to the city tomorrow to find their fortunes in the big smoke. So it was decided I had to go over to their place for one more coffee before they left. The house was sadly empty of furniture when we got there as everything has been packed up and stored in anticipation of their huge shift tomorrow, so we sat on the floor in the kitchen chatting and drinking coffee, and Miss K played with the family's son and daughter who quickly became her biggest fans. The son, who is almost 2 is such a lady killer, he sat with his arm around Miss K, feeding her dry wheat bix and kissing her occasionally. Miss K of course is never one to refuse food so she loved all the special attention she was receiving.

They also have a large dog there, a labrador cross and it is huge. I mean huge. It could probably stick its head on my desk as I typed were it here right now. Luckily despite its size it is the gentlest dog you could meet, and he is fabulous with children, having been around them since he was a puppy so he wasn't too concerned when Miss K decided to crawl over his tail suddenly, nor when she decided to pull herself up on him. I was more surprised of Miss K's reaction to the dog, especially as she hasn't had much to do with dogs in her short 17 months, but she adored him and kept rushing to him to give him pats and hugs, and she didn't even mind when he licked her. The dogs owner was of course around at all times to make sure he didn't trod on any of the babies, as the oldest child in the house is not yet four, but he is such a well trained dog there really was never any concern anyone would get hurt. It was actually such a sad moment when I realised it was past our dinner time and we needed to get home and ready for bed, I had to keep the good byes brief so that I didn't lose it and start crying in front of them, but I have promised as soon as they are all settled in to their new home, Miss K and I will be up for a visit.

As for Miss K, she is cruising along nicely. We realised this week that she has been saying da da a lot lately, and that when she says it, she actually means Grandma. I'd never thought of it much as when she was younger Grandma was bumma, but lately whenever mum leaves the room, or if she's in her cot and she sees mum making coffee in the kitchen she starts yelling da da da da at the top of her lungs and we finally clicked the other day she's calling for her Grandma. She also learned how to say Grandpa this week, (ba pa) and she's learnt my niece Eliza's name (zee zee). Apart from that most of her chat is still unintelligible babble, but it certainly is plentiful, she is rarely quiet these days and if I can't hear her it's usually a pretty good sign she's up to no good and I need to find her NOW. She is still not taking more than a couple steps unassisted, no matter how much we encourage her, unfortunately there is little I can do besides keep encouraging her and making sure she isn't given the excuse to keep slacking off which means I have to stop carrying her everywhere. My back will thank me for this.

Well that's another week summed up nicely, as you can tell there was very little organising done this week thanks to the gastro, but hopefully I'll be able to get back into it this week and keep fighting the good fight. Well until next time, stay awesome readers and of course don't forget to like my Facebook page for regular updates and much more. Unless you are one of the wonderful people who have already, in which case you are welcome to go about your business as normal.

Insert witty title here

Again it's been too long between posts, but this time I have a good reason. I've been trying to write a post about Miss K's hospital stay, but even 12 months after the fact, it's too hard to write about. At first I put off writing it until we hit the 12 month mark just in case I jinxed her and she ended up sick again, but that date came and went, and it was still too hard. Maybe one day I'll be able to tell you guys the story, but right now is not the right time.

Another reason I don't have time to blog much at the moment is that Miss K is so busy these days, and I spend more time than ever chasing her around and keeping her out of trouble. She has such a fearless attitude, which is great in some ways, but in others it means she doesn't see how bad an idea dive bombing off my bed is. I've had to do a mad ninja style dash to the other side of the bed on several occasions now to make sure she doesn't face plant on my floor jackass style.

Tonight we went out to a pub for tea as it was my baby sister's 20th birthday yesterday so the whole family came out for tea, and Miss K had her first pub meal, which was really just some of my pasta and some of grandpa's chips, but she loved it. Unfortunately we had to cut our evening short as Miss K had decided this afternoon she didn't need a nap, as playing with her mobile that hangs over her cot was much more fun, so she was exhausted by the time she had finished her tea. This is something I have come to accept, and as a result I really try to plan most of our outings for while the sun is up, but once in a while the rules have to be bent for special occasions.

It has always surprised me how well Miss K adapts to new foods and drinks. We swapped to normal cow's milk last week, and she's taken to it better than I expected. Especially since I was lactose intolerant as a baby and couldn't seem to keep the stuff down, and even now days the only time I drink milk is in my coffee.

As for me, my eyes are hanging out of my head as I type this, so I'm going to bed for hopefully a nice long sleep. I'll leave you now with a picture my sister took of Miss K "sleeping" this afternoon.

Never invite me to your parties...

So this is what I do when I'm trying hard not to laugh in someone's face...

Yup, this is how I spent the candle party this evening. Writing down everything I thought so that I wouldn't open my big mouth and embarrass either myself or my little sister. I have a bad habit of opening my mouth before I think, and it never ends well. Once I was at a store with my little sister, when the cashier asked one of her co-workers to call her a price check because something wouldn't scan. I, much to the humiliation of my sister turned to her and said "OK, you're a price check." Yes it's very vaudeville I know, but I said it without even thinking. Sometimes I wonder if everyone else has an internal filter that just happens to be missing in me. It doesn't matter how disgusting it is, if I think it, I say it. For example, when my sister gave me the piece of paper, I told her it would probably be covered with men's genitalia by the end of the evening (although my language wasn't that clean when I said it, I just prefer to keep this blog G-rated.) This lack of filter causes much laughter and disgust in my family, and gets me into lots of trouble. But I don't go out of my way to be disgusting, or to get into trouble. Like I said it just happens before I can think. I can only hope that Miss K has more of a filtering system in her brain than her mother does. Although given that she lives with me, and hears the way I talk every single day I'd say the chances of that are slightly slimmer than for most.

So I have walked away from a party without causing any discomfort for anyone, but I had lots of laughs, as did my little sister, who I have now renamed Danny because for some reason, even though this is the second time the woman running the party had met her, she couldn't get her name right, and just kept calling her Danny. And I have also learned something very important too; don't swear when someone tells you that an infinity candle will cost you over $150.00 because it just gives the game away that you have only come to the party for the free wine and devilled eggs.