Saturday, 8 February 2014

Secret Subject Swap - Romancing the Stone (Hearted)

Hello again my lovely readers, I am back for the February round of Secret Subject Swap. You would all have to know the drill by now wouldn't you? I'll explain it for any of the new comers anyway (welcome newbies) Twelve lovely and brilliant bloggers all get together and send a subject they want another blogger to write about to the lovely and endlessly patient Karen at Baking in a Tornado. Karen then distributes the subjects evenly between the twelve of us, and we simultaneously post the end result. I have been doing this for 9 months now and each month is more fun than the last.

So first things first I will introduce the rest of the team to you, once you have read the fun that is my blog, you really need to go visit everyone else, even if just to find out who got my subject and how she or he managed to mold it into something cohesive. Spread the love far and wide and let them all know they are awesome.


http://www.BakingInATornado.com             Baking In A Tornado
http://themomisodes.com                          The Momisodes
http://followmehome.shellybean.com           Follow me home . . .
http://dinoheromommy.com/                      Dinosaur Superhero Mommy
http://dates2diapers2.blogspot.com             Dates 2 Diapers 2
http://thethreegerbers.blogspot.ch/ Confessions of a part-time working mom
http://spinstersnacks.com                         Spinster Snacks
http://www.fbxadventures.blogspot.com  FBX Adventures (In Parenting)
http://morethancheeseandbeer.blogspot.com More Than Cheese and Beer
http://smalltalkmama.com                          Small Talk Mama
http://www.juiceboxconfession.com             Juicebox Confession
http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com          Spatulas on Parade

So today's topic for me is: Tell me your ideal romantic day.  Your time spent preparing for the day, the events, and the day itself. And it was submitted by Evil Joy Speaks.

I actually wrecked myself with laughter when I opened the email with this subject in it, as I am truly one of the least romantic people I know. This is the absolute truth. When Miss K's dad proposed to me at Arthur's Seat (a tourist attraction based around one of the most breathtaking panoramic views you will ever see) all I could focus on was the fact that he kept mucking up the words, even though I know he had been practising exactly what he was going to say for weeks before hand. It was still beautiful and I did cry, but I'm sure the sentiment behind it all would have been less wasted on someone else.

That's not to say I don't appreciate if a guy makes an effort for his lady, I'm just not as big a fan of all the gushy stuff. So my idea of a romantic day may be totally different to what the rest of you would actually call romantic. (Is this a bad time to mention I've only ever had one valentines day when I got a gift from a boyfriend, and only two boyfriends who have ever bought me flowers?)

Now if we're going out in my life currently, the first thing I'd need for a romantic day would be a date to take me out. Sadly given that I have decided to focus all of my attention on being a part time secretary/part time business owner/part time mum, it hasn't left much room in my life for persons of the opposite sex. Add in the fact that most of the men I see during my days are in the process of divorcing their wives and you come home feeling as romantic as a wet sponge on most days. But for the purposes of this post I'm going to pretend that the guy taking me out on this date exists, and he is even going out on this date willingly. 

Now I don't know how other women prepare for dates. I'm assuming you spend hours doing hair and make up, choosing your outfit and practising your best come hither smile. My current beauty regime since Miss K was born consists of picking something out of my floordrobe* that doesn't smell like sweat and isn't decorated with last night's dinner thanks to my finicky daughter. Make up is a real luxury for me these days, and given what I have planned for this date, I think I'd probably wear minimum make up, and something comfortable but flattering. (That is actually harder than you think with my current range of clothes.) It will probably take longer to bribe someone from my family to take Miss K for the day so I can have some alone time than it will take for me to actually get ready for this date. 

So the thing that impresses me the most about a guy is when he takes the time to listen to the woman he is trying to please. You want to make me happy? Take me to the beach. And not just in summer either. I love walking through the waves during winter. So the rest of my preparation would probably consist of dropping constant hints to my beau and hoping he gets the point that I want to walk along the beach with him. Now I know the old walking hand in hand along the shoreline is actually a pretty big cliche when it comes to being romantic, but I'm more likely to be the one kicking the waves and splashing the person I'm walking with, so that really doesn't leave much room for holding hands and staring wistfully out to sea. 

Now we'd spend maybe two hours driving to this beach in the morning, (well he'd drive, I'll be too busy looking out the window at all the pretty scenery going past.) so there will be about an hour to walk along the beach before I'll start getting the munchies and need to stop for lunch. Depending on the season will depend where I want to eat. If it's summer we HAVE to have fish and chips on the sand. You're just not Australian if you don't eat fish and chips on the shoreline when you go to the beach. If it is winter however, I'll probably not want to sit out in the elements just to eat, so we'll need to find a cozy little pub somewhere for a sit down meal. The atmosphere in some of these tourist town pubs is just amazing and I love finding one that I could just sit in all day. 

But despite what some people think, for me sitting in a pub all day isn't really the most romantic thing to do, so I'll probably suggest we spend our afternoon exploring the town attached to the beach we have come to visit. Beach side towns are always such beautiful places to explore, and not just because of the shops (although that is always a bit of a draw for me) but the houses are usually not too shabby either, and I love looking at houses. (call me weird, I don't care. One of my favourite places to visit when Miss K and I visit her Melbourne family is the upper class part of Sydenham just because the houses there are breathtaking. They seriously all look like massive convention centres.) 

Now you may be reading this now and thinking to yourself that playing tourists isn't romantic at all. What you're forgetting is I've orchestrated a situation where for a lot of the time it's just the two of us, and all those hours spent driving leaves a lot of room for talking. And one of the most romantic things for me is a man who can hold his own end of a conversation for hours. It doesn't have to be all deep and intellectual, there can be a few fart jokes thrown in for light entertainment, but to have someone to talk to that you never run out of things to say to is a pretty rare find, so it always excites me to find someone like this. There will be moments of silence too, because you need to find someone you can have comfortable silence with. (One of my closest friends is my favourite person to be silent with. I go to his house when I'm tired of noise because we have lots of long spaces without any conversation. We don't need to talk, we're just happy to have each other's company.)

So we're done with being tourists, it's getting late and we need to go home, but that doesn't mean the day is over. The last thing you must do if you want to impress me is put up with watching a chick flick. When I'm in a relationship I will put up with lots of terrible blokey films, and sometimes I may even enjoy them, but every now and again I need to feel that my man will take an interest in the things that make me happy to watch. I won't even crack it if he points out the plot holes (I see them too, I just don't let them ruin my experience) and he'll get bonus points if his comments make me laugh. (A little tip to all the men out there, I am not alone in this wish. If you really want to make your lady happy, suggest you two watch one of her favourite movies together every once in a while. You might even get us in a frisky mood if you pick the right movie :D)

Because this blog is a G rated blog I'm going to say the evening ends with a quick kiss goodnight and I go to bed with my integrity intact, but if you want my evening to go a different path, please feel free to use your imagination. I for one would be more than happy to just collapse into bed and pass out for six hours before Miss K comes in at 6 to watch Despicable Me 2 for the millionth time in a row.

Well that's it for me, be sure to visit everyone else on my list and enjoy their offerings too. For any real romantics out there who are getting all excited for the most romantic day of the year, I hope you have a wonderful Valentines Day, think of me as I try to survive three days with Miss K's Melbourne family while you're having your oysters and champagne. This year is especially awkward for Miss K's dad and I because had things gone differently we would have been married three years this Valentines Day. We tend to try to avoid eachother on February 14th but this year the calendar gods were against us and it happens right on a scheduled visit. Stay awesome and be sure to check back here on the 14th because Use Your Words is back again and I'll be participating again. 
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